


one through ten

by shairiru



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-05
Updated: 2015-04-05
Packaged: 2018-03-21 09:47:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3687645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shairiru/pseuds/shairiru
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are supposedly ten steps to not fall in love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	one through ten

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sunlit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunlit/gifts), [skywxxrds](https://archiveofourown.org/users/skywxxrds/gifts).



> Happy HS AkaMido Day!!!

1\. Don’t hang out with them

  
“But you have to go with us!” Momoi is pouting as Akashi adjusts his training bag on his shoulder. Everyone is planning to go to the arcade to loosen up after the intense training session. And by everyone, it means Midorima also goes. Momoi and Kuroko have somehow managed to convince him, which is why he himself should not be going.  
  
“I have piano lessons later,” he lies.  
  
“Weren’t you done with your piano lessons last month?” Midorima asks. Of course he would know.  
  
“I’ve taken up a new module,” he turns around, not meeting anyone’s eyes. It’ll be risky if he meets _his_ eyes, then he might actually be swayed into coming with them, and all of his resolve for doing this will be gone in a flash. “See you next week."

  
  
2\. Limit conversation  
 

  
He’s walking along the hallway, student council papers on hand, when he sees a glimpse of Midorima on the other end. The other boy is, as usual, busy avoiding other people who pass him by. He has always been reserved. Come to think of it, only _he_ holds regular conversations with Midorima. And so when their eyes meet, and he sees Midorima’s eyes widen expectantly, and he looks away as fast as he could, he feels guilty.   
  
They pass each other without a single word and Akashi is finally able to let out a breath. The urge to talk to Midorima is great, but he reminds himself he has a goal to accomplish, and some sacrifices have to be made.  
  
(If he had looked around, he would have seen Midorima’s shoulders fall.)

 

3\. Think about the consequences

  
   
Akashi has no idea since when he started to feel like this with Midorima. He isn’t even aware that it’s possible to feel this way towards Midorima. Midorima Shintarou, of all people. What would his father say? What would everyone say?  
  
What would being with him even bring him? Sure, Midorima makes him smile. A lot. And he challenges him in many ways others won’t and can’t. Midorima’s eyes have never showed him fear, no contempt, only a flame of a fight. And sometimes, those emerald spheres would soften up a little and show him a sliver of friendship he has found nowhere else.  
  
Liking Midorima Shintarou would only bring him (happiness) problems.

  
  
4\. Think about his drawbacks

  
   
What’s even so great about him- Midorima Shintarou with his oddly green hair and unwavering devotion to Oha-Asa? What a waste of money. Does he even know how to save? (Isn’t it oddly endearing though to see him walk through the hallways, proudly holding his lucky items for everyone to see?)  
  
How about that hobby of always taping his left hand? It’s for luck, he says. That means his hand always get sweaty after, right? Does that mean his left hand is smelly? How...unsophisticated. (Akashi had, of course, had the chance to remove his tapes one time out of curiosity. Midorima gladly let him, and Akashi can say his hands had smelled of vanilla. It was a scent that stuck to him for days.)   
  
Also, that ever-present frown of his. He never smiles at all!   
  
(Except that one time when they were practicing and he passed to Midorima and it was so perfect that the boy looked at him with surprise.  
  
“Nice pass,” he had said for the very first time with a small smile.  
  
And that was the first time Akashi experienced the phrase “ _my heart skipped a beat_ .”)

  
  
5\. Vocalize your intention

  
  
“From now on, we are enemies.”  
  
Akashi tells this to all of the Generation of Miracles, a group of highly skilled boys that went out of control and must now go on separate ways in order to satiate the hunger to know who is the strongest. But partly he tells this to Midorima, the boy he has come to care about more than he should but must feel unsympathetic for in order to accomplish that which he has planned for his objective.  
  
His eyes never left Midorima as he walks out of the gym where they used to practice and play together, his back straight and shoulders tense. Just a few years ago, he’s a boy with wide, innocent eyes and unsure steps. Now his eyes are cold as steel and he walks with a purpose, one that he did not set for himself. Akashi knows it is him to blame for it. And for this he has come to realize his feelings are not worthy of Midorima Shintarou.  
 

  
6\. Be a B word

  
  
“Reo?”  
  
“Yes, Sei-chan?”   
  
“Do you have any idea what ‘B word’ means?”  
  
Mibuchi Reo has been Akashi’s vice captain in Rakuzan for over five months now, but never has he heard such a question leave his captain’s lips before. He looks at Akashi and sees him holding a worn-out paper on his hand. He almost thinks Akashi is joking until he sees the serious expression he has.  
  
“Ah, I believe it’s a Western term that means having an attitude that is less than flattering. It’s usually done to people one doesn’t like.”  
  
“To show hatred?”  
  
“Something like that. The simplest act of this is not being friendly.”  
  
“I see,” Akashi nods thoughtfully, “Thank you.”

  
  
(When Reo sees Akashi refuse the handshake Midorima Shintarou has offered him after their match in the Winter Cup, his mind goes back to that small exchange three months prior.)

  
  
7\. Focus on someone else

  
  
Ever since they’ve won against the Jabber Wocks, the rest of the Vorpal Swords have been gathering together regularly. Sometimes it’d be Momoi’s idea. Sometimes Kise’s. Sometimes Takao’s. Sometimes, all three of them would plan it all. Akashi is happy that they get to hang out like old times, but it’s particularly hard for him when he realized that after all these years, he is still harboring feelings for Midorima.   
  
And so when they would all hang out, he avoids being alone with Midorima as much as he can. He’d talk to Murasakabira at times. Hyuuga and Riko are also good people to talk to. They are very intelligible and Riko especially know a lot of things. He gets to talk to Kuroko, too, which means Kise is automatically a part of the conversation. He can’t enjoy a conversation with Aomine and Kagami, though. The two of them are in a totally different level than him in conversation topics. He can’t just reprimand Aomine everytime he would start to talk about vulgar things, can he?  
  
But despite all these conversations, he can never seem to get Midorima out from a corner of his eye. He can always, _always_ , see him. Most times, Takao hangs around him, ever so lively and noisy. Takao is a nice guy. He gets to talk to him once in a while, too, and he can understand how in spite Midorima’s aversion to people, Takao has managed to stay as his friend.  
  
He sees Midorima looking his way, and he hurriedly turns around to avoid meeting his eyes. The list told him to focus on someone else. Obviously, he isn’t focusing hard enough.

  
  
8\. Think about their feelings

  
  
Three years has passed, right? Three years of liking Midorima Shintarou to no avail. It’s not like he’s actually doing something for him to be liked back but...he had hoped Midorima would get the tiniest clue? Midorima has always been so devoted to defeating him. They spent so many times alone together in middle school. Playing shogi, conducting meetings, walking home. Has it not triggered anything within Midorima at all?  
  
Maybe...there isn’t any chance at the first place. Maybe Midorima sees him only as a friend. Only as the person he sorely needs to defeat.   
  
Three years and he has been holding on to unfounded hopes.  
  
And it is probably time to let go.

  
  
9\. Focus on yourself

  
   
Rakuzan’s training in his last year is the most intensive yet. They have managed to reclaim the Winter Cup title when they won against Shuutoku 107-104. It was a great game. The best he had yet, to be honest. He went to Midorima first thing after and offered his hand.  
  
“As a compensation for last year,” he told him with a smile. “Good game.”  
  
Midorima looked shock at first, then he smiled, too and took his hand. “Congratulations. Next time, for sure.”  
  
Akashi had walked away with his heart pounding faster than it was after the fourth quarter.  
  
Now, he leads the rest of Rakuzan in their running drills, his mind focused on only one thing: to get better. _Focus on yourself._    
  
“Mibuchi?” Akashi slows down his pace to match with Mibuchi’s.  
  
“Yes, Sei-chan?”  
  
“If someone tells you to focus on yourself, how would you take its meaning?”  
  
“Ah, then it means I would have to love myself. Someone has once said that before you learn to love other people, you must learn to love yourself first and foremost. It’s just then that you can be able to love others unconditionally.”  
  
Akashi looks at him with wide eyes.  
  
“That’s a good way to put it,” he comments. He then picks up speed and leaves a very confused Mibuchi behind.  
  
“What was that about, Reo-nee?” Hayama asks as he catches up to him.  
  
“Well, if I didn’t know Sei-chan, I’d think he’s been asking me about love advices all this time,” he muses.  
  
Hayama cocks his head to one side, looking at Akashi thoughtfully.  
  
“Maybe he _is._ ”  
  
Akashi doesn’t hear all of this because he has already gone inside his mind to _focus on himself._ Loving himself is something he has already done some time ago. Would he be this confident if he has not an ounce of admiration for his own person? Well then, the list had told him to focus on those he wants to achieve next.  
  
He lists: this year, he aims for Rakuzan to defend its championship titles under his captainship; for him to graduate valedictorian of their batch; and for him to get into the top university with his desired degree. Not hard at all.  
  
(Deep in his mind, he lists: Midorima Shintarou.)

  
   
10\. Get busy

  
  
Swimming is a good hobby to pick up, Akashi has discovered one sunny weekend that he is in Tokyo. The final tip on the list is to _Get busy._ Not that Akashi is not busy enough, what with academics, basketball, horseback riding, shogi, violin, piano, student council and college applications, but if after all these years he has yet time to worry about his feelings, then he has not been busy enough.  
  
“Hey, isn’t that Akashi?”  
  
He freezes at the familiar voice of Takao and at the accompanying implication of it. He turns around wishing he can be wrong some times.  
  
“Takao. Midorima. Fancy seeing you here.”  
  
“Yo, Akashi! Fancy seeing _you_ here.” Takao greets, “You alone?”  
  
“Yes. How about the two of you?”  
  
“The rest of the team is here with us. Captain said it’s a good time for recreational activities for the team. Ah--that reminds me, I still have something to prepare or else captain’s gonna get my ass! Shin-chan, see you later, ‘kay?!”  
  
Takao leaves at once, not giving Midorima the chance to protest. The two of them are left standing next to each other.  
  
“It’s been a long time,” Midorima is the first to break the silence. Akashi feels his heart jump.  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“How have you been?”  
  
“Busy, as usual.”  
  
“Since when have you been not?”  
  
Akashi chuckles. “ _Busier_ , if I might correct.”  
  
“You shouldn’t be handling more than you can.”  
  
“I wouldn’t handle them in the first place if I know I can’t. I don’t make a move that won’t assure me of my victory, you should know that well by now.”  
  
“I know that best, Akashi,” he huffs, “What brings you to Tokyo anyway?”  
  
It’s nothing, really. His father wanted to check on the main house but Akashi volunteered, telling him there must be matters in the company that should be taken care of. He is, after all, old enough to be responsible with the main house.   
  
Maybe he just wanted a reason to go to Tokyo.  
  
“Duties,” he answers, “But I’m finished now so I thought I could spend some recreational time.”  
  
“I go here every weekend,” Midorima tells him as he adjusts his goggles around his eyes. “This place is the best you could go to in town. High-class facilities, regularly maintained pools, pleasant staff...only the best.”  
  
“I can see that.” His eyes do not leave Midorima, “I think I might come back here.”  
  
“Well, don’t hesitate to contact me if you need help...if you’re going to need it, that is.”  
  
“Thank you, Midorima.”  
  
“Later, then.”  
  
(If he had looked closely, he would have seen the smile that formed on Midorima’s face.)  
  
When Midorima walks away to the diving board, Akashi lets himself smile. It seems that no amount of steps can stop him from falling for Midorima over and over again. He notes in his mind that the list he had been keeping faithfully all these years, that is supposedly going to help him not to fall in love, must be thrown away.   
  
What is its use anyway when he didn’t want to not fall in love in the first place?

 

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is dedicated to 0406 trio + kikuro flagraiser :3 It all started because Kich had to link us to this [ article](youqueen.com/love/seduction/how-to-not-fall-in-love/). Do not try it at home. Sorry if this is so silly OTL


End file.
